I was always so good at being what was required of me at the time. Like my survival depended on it. That my source of love and goodness was external to me. And if I didn’t get that then how would I even know if I was OK? Perhaps this has been your experience too? I’m not sure if this is a woman thing (and I’m not sure what kind of feminist that makes me to even say such a thing). And then I wonder if I am even a feminist because I really like it that my husband fuels up my car, and that two men are currently lopping the trees in our backyard and it’s hot and dirty and I’d like to offer them a cool glass of water (to be fair, once it would have been a freshly baked morning tea, but I’ve (mostly) moved past this stage since moving off the family farm).
My identity was always shaped around things I had no ‘control’ over, and the system I grew up in. A farmer’s daughter (what about my mother?), the second-born daughter (followed closely by the first-born son), the blonde one, one of the smart kids, one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. The things I thought I chose – a Science degree, north Queensland, the first man I fell in love with – all influenced by something else, operating at some subconscious level and completely out of my awareness. Suddenly I became a mother, a single mother at that, and I had a whole new role to be. The character I played got more complicated and dramatic (and perhaps more interesting?) after that. For a while. I could have said I was doing what I wanted and ‘being myself’ but I’d never stopped to consider for one moment who she really was. There were snippets. She’s kind of hilarious. Articulate. Loving. Generous. Self-centred and others focussed simultaneously. Calm and impatient. Hardworking. Determined. Scattered. Ferocious.
But if you don’t know who you are, then how can you possibly know what you’re meant to be doing? I did the things, to help me know who I was. So I could define myself by them: A marine biologist, a farmer, an environmental scientist, a single mother, a tourism operator, a mother of two, a wife, a rural financial counsellor, a mother of three, a pregnant, single mother of 3, a single mother of 4. A turning point in the story. HERstory. Every single time when I thought my children held me up, I found instead they propelled me forward. As did the things that weren’t ‘right’ for me, and the people who weren’t ‘the one’ for me, and the roles I did so well (it’s a thing you know, to do all the things well. I mastered this. It’s easy when you don’t know who you are, to be everything). It all took time. It took lots of searching outside of myself for guidance, permission and direction. And SHE was there all along, loving me anyway (and especially when it was hard).
If you want to know what it is you’re here to do in the world, you’ll need to start with WHO you are. We can do purpose until the cows come home, but without enough of you in there the thing you do is always going to work at a functional level (it will provide a service, bring in income, fill your time, get things done) but it will not satisfy the yearnings of your soul. You will forever be sacrificing some of WHO you are to get the thing done, instead of being solidly rooted in the centre of your being. Directed by an internal force, soft yet strong.
I know how to find out WHO you are. I’ve created space just for that. First thing you need is space and time. To find yourSELF somewhere between selfish and sacrifice. And after that? Is everything that comes next.
My new program starts soon. Join me (us) on a 4 week deep dive into remembering, uncovering, like being reborn. Knowing who you are is the foundation to everything else, so herSELF is about:
• Identity (who you really are, and who you’re not). The light. The shadow. The centre of being.
• Core beliefs and the way they shape our behaviour and our outcomes.
• The life-altering magic of boundaries
• What happens when you dedicate space and time to YOU. HER. SELF.
• Tapping into the incredible + infinite resource of your true self.
How do we do this? 4 x Weekly LIVE Trainings, 4 x weekly LIVE Q&A sessions, Course content specific to the program, Facebook support group, worksheets, video + audio. (Even after the 4 weeks you have access to Teachable for 12 months where the content and recorded training’s will be hosted). All this for $999.00.
And for those who need additional support, there is an optional upgrade for some support.
The search for purpose is intricately entwined with the search for inner peace and to find peace you need to remember who you really are. Your identity. The wholeness and OKness of everything you truly are and not the masks or the pretence or the expectations or roles you play.
*NOTE: I primarily work with feminine core beings, if this is you, you’ll know what I mean. I have created these programs for you. If you feel drawn to my work but identify another way, please reach out. I can (and do) work with all humans x
Big loves xx