Vulnerability is 'being willing to express the truth no matter what,' Oprah Winfrey says. Watch as she expands beautifully on this important way of life:
I had always had a dream. A sense of wanting more from my life than mediocre.
I may have framed it up as competition and being driven, but everything I did was motivated by a sense inside in me that I wanted my life to mean something, and I couldn’t just take the regular road.
One morning, the discovery of my (impending) fourth daughter and a certainty I would be doing it alone was a massive wake up call for me. I’d already decided I was going to be a life coach, and start my own business and help people find their own pathway to the life that they wanted. It seemed hilarious and ironic that my life seemed to be getting less and less like the one I hoped for. But, here’s the thing. My beautiful dream. Happened. Because I asked the right questions, and I found that the dream was actually fuelled by purpose. And so I couldn’t not do it.
I found out what was needed to make a dream happen.
Space – Around you. To breathe. To create. To be.
Rising – Within yourself. Showing up. Being more.
Support – Foundation. Something supportive to surround you.
I did not find these things easily or immediately. In fact, like any good process I found them and lost them again and again. But in the end, they all lead me back to the centre of everything. Purpose.
Your path to purpose, like mine, has likely been a convoluted one. Mine involved many children, much relationship turmoil, many different jobs, many moments of thinking I might have found the way and many realising I was still lost.
I do not believe I am here (in the world, writing this, doing what I do) because I am different or better or more able to manage. I believe I am here because we are all the SAME.
I believe we all have a gift to the world. That through our own becoming we pave the way for others. My purpose has always been to find the gift inside me and then help others find theirs. Like that kid in “The Sixth Sense” I see things not all people can see. To say that out loud the first time was totally freaky to me. I don’t see dead people though – I see people’s magic, their purpose, their potential, all that is possible for them…and my job, if they are in front of me, is to help them bring it out. That is all.
A life on purpose is a very different life than the one that feels like an accident. I have four children, and only one them was “planned”. I seemed to go through life knowing there was more for me, but trying to get it by doing more, being busier, getting more qualifications and recognition, all whilst have more children and mostly being a single parent.
A life on purpose has choice. I choose how I’m going to show up, who I’m going to show up with and what I do with my time, and how to do my work in a life that has many competing facets – motherhood, relationships, family, work, learning, living.
Not in the traditional, sensible way but in that way that life feels like you thought life should. A life on purpose feels a certain way – the men I’ve asked have used words like “invincible”, “powerful”, “on task”, “focused”; the women say “empowered”, “in flow”, “full”, “aligned”.
In PURPOSE the thing you do (the writing, the art, the understanding, the words, the order) comes naturally to you, but it’s not always comfortable. It’s easy but intense. It requires you to keep showing up and levelling up and asking the right questions. It requires you to say no to the wrong things. It requires you to acknowledge you are not normal and want more for yourself and your people. It requires other people.
And here’s what happens. When all those three things come together…
There’s space, and in space magic grows. Ideas. Innovation. Hope. Creativity. The most valuable stuff you have to offer. Already inside you.
And when you rise and you’re showing up, your people – the ones who believe what you believe – will see you and hear you, and they’ll resonate with what you offer or who you are and suddenly you’ll not only be doing your favourite work all day, you‘ll be doing it with all your favourite people.
The ones who only know you as yourself. Who expect nothing less.
And you’ll feel held and supported by something much bigger than yourself, for something much bigger than yourself.
And that life? Feels incredible.
And that, most simply, is the power of purpose.