This weekend, I’m home alone. Once upon at time, earlier in this life of mine, being home alone would have sent me into a panic.
This weekend I’m hanging with myself, have hung a bit with my sister and her family, have made treats for my 10 year olds birthday tomorrow, ate breakfast for dinner, had a long bath, and practiced for a seminar I’m working at next weekend.
In one of my jobs I work for The Entrepreneur Tribe/Cre8 as a seminar facilitator and mentor, and I could talk about what I do for days on end (so luckily we get to run a three day seminar and I get to talk a (fair) bit at that), but sometimes, for whatever reason, some people don’t want to hear. I’m going to tell the story here though because if I had one gift to give to the world it would be to start people on their own journey of discovery, the journey to find themselves and their own meaning and purpose for life as we know it. But before I begin, there’s something you should know.
I grew up in a family where my Mum was (and still is) a Jehovah’s Witness. As a child I would go door-knocking with my Mum to spread “the good news”. She believes whole heartedly in that religion, and in saving us and other people, spreading the “good news” was the only way to reach them. As a shy, country kid door knocking was nerve-wracking and humiliating for me, especially because, as I got older, I wasn’t sure I believed in the message. Imagine then, how the telling of this story and the sharing of my “good news” has caused me such angst. But if I am to be the change I want to see in the world, the place to start is here. With my message.
So why would I write this? Why would I knock on your door with baited breath and hope you will at least be friendly?
So long ago (about 10 years), before all this started, I thought life was how it was meant to be, and although it didn’t always feel like it should, and things happened that didn’t seem to make sense or be fair or go how my life was supposed to go, I didn’t know it was possible that it could be like it is now. And no-one could have told me that there was a whole ‘nother life for me so I kept trying to make the one I had worked. But it just wasn’t working.
So I did a seminar called Ignite Your Life by Cre8, and I got a coach, and I did some more seminars, and I read some great books, and I found amazing people to fill my life with and here I am.
And what do I know now that I didn’t know then?
10 ways Ignite Leadership changed my world:
1. I found me. I found the woman in me who is wise, kind, inspiring, passionate, alive, funny, gracious and grateful. She’s always been there but I put her away behind this thing called life and kids and relationship struggles and a constant internal battle with “not being enough”. I found my enoughness. Heaps of it. Way more than enough.
2. I learnt that the person responsible for my life was me, and no amount of whinging about my husband at barbeques or telling my kids to be quieter or calmer (in a loud and chaotic way) or working so hard I couldn’t see out or pretending it was all OK, was going to give me a life. No amount of blaming or resenting or bitching or carrying on was going to take me where I needed to go. So I made a different choice. And here I am.
3. I worked out that having an adult relationship with my parents and loving and accepting them for all that they are and all that they weren’t in the story of my life was one of the greatest ways to find peace. That by cleaning up those relationships, and being open, honest and loving with my Mum and Dad would lead to other things in my life falling into place – my work, my relationship, how I am as a mother.
4. I discovered I need to be happy first. And nurtured, and cared for, and loved and adored. By me first and then, of course, I’m much more lovable and adorable.
5. I learnt how to have a great relationship, and then I got one, and then I learnt you have to keep helping it grow to keep it great. And I discovered that for all the crazy times I thought I was just making a mess, I was learning some cool stuff which would help with me gift of working with people and their relationships.
6. I got real about what it was that lights me up. I found my passion for people, and a system to guide them through, and every day I get to work with people and people are JUST AMAZING – funny and complicated and unique and divine and crazy and all searching for the same thing. The same thing I was. It’s got a lot to do with LOVE. Love yourself, love the people around you, love what you do, love what happens, love life.
7. I found out we are all the same, we might be using different strategies, but we are having the same struggles and think somehow we are alone and separate with that. We’re not, we’re all the same at a deeper level, and hanging with those people who really see you and show you themselves, that’s really friendship.
8. I experienced an experience like no other, in my life, yet. And that was pretty cool, and fun, and I learnt I didn’t have to be cool or fun to have that. I just had to be me, and there si no-one in the world who is quite like me.
9. There are emotional states (like passionate, certain, empowered, hilarious) that work for you and emotional states (like anger, resentment, tiredness, self-pity) that do not. I chose to do more of the ones that worked, and found I didn’t really need all the ones that didn’t. And then I got the life I wanted.
10. When you are open and share yourself with other people, it feels really awesome
11. Don’t worry, just be awesome, and everything with be OK
12. Never stop at 10!