On retreat, making space for yourself (so you know what you need), and asking yourself to prioritise what you need. Don’t steal from yourself… And normalise saying the things we need to say to express that our needs are valid and worthy and that we need things to heal and be healthy.
In this patriarchal system, in this model that we were raised in and that we still live in. It’s really hard to actually ask for what you need without feeling as if you are somehow lacking because you might need more than others. Or that some people make things seem so effortless and easy, and you watch people juggle all the things that they juggle and from the outside, they appear to be doing it effortlessly and easily. And so we doubt ourselves and we’re like, “Oh, this is all a bit much for me,” …. but don’t do that!
Because ultimately for you to actually, really be able to tap into your magnificence in everything that you are, you need to get out from under the system which holds you down. And that is one which makes us busy all the time, and that is a system which makes us not care for ourselves so that we don’t feel as great as we can feel. And then we’re not actually able to go out into the world and do what it is that we need, with the energy that we need to do it.
Instead of a to-do-list, make a self-care-list based on taking care of yourself as an act of generational healing. Of changing things to do with what’s happened for generations in the oppression of women.
The keeping busy, or in the house, in the home, dedicated to others and all of that stuff. Instead of doing what it is that we could do in the world, which can, by the way, include cooking, doing things for people being generous, caring for others. It doesn’t mean that I can’t do those things, but I can do those things from a choice, a place of power. And when I do those things from a place of power, I definitely do them less, they don’t take over my other life.
Some things you probably didn’t know about self-care.
The Black Panthers popularized the concept of self-care in the 1970s, as a means of staying resilient while experiencing the repeated injuries of systemic, interpersonal, and medical racism.
Self-care became this concept of caring for yourself. As in, you’re going to have to, if you want to be healthy and well.
You will have to lead your own care.
That’s what’s the concept of self-care was. So it became a term to help people rise up and step into their power. And so, self-care can be a toolkit that will help you really step into your own power.
You do not need to earn self-care.
Watch my video below.
Big Loves, Fleur xx